QURA'AN

"Read! In the Name of your Lord, Who has created (all that exists)"

 I can't read anymore. The thought of even opening my Qura'an was long lost, never seeming to come back. My scripture laid on my shelf, dusty, old, and unwilling to even to be touched.
I slowly hear these verses being recited to me...

 "READ! IN THE NAME OF YOUR LORD, WHO HAS CREATED ALL THAT EXISTS! (1)  

Surah Al-Alaq, Chapter 96 

 And thats when it hit me...."WHO HAS CREATED ALL THAT EXISTS!" The King, the creator of the universe, the Sustainer and the cherisher has given US (his slaves) a scripture....IN WHICH DEFINES LIFE! A pure, never changed book that entitles peace and tranquility upon all commands. 

 Along with that, All I HAD TO DO WAS SIMPLY, GIVE TIME TO READ IT. TO UNDERSTAND IT! To actually comprehend what every verse brings about. I calmly desire for tears to deliberately accumulate with every verse I read...to feel the spark of emotions when Allah (S.W.T) says, 

When My servants ask thee concerning Me, I am indeed close (to them); I listen to the prayer of every supplicant when he calleth on Me; let them also with a will to listen to My call and believe in Me; that they may walk in the right way. (186) 

Surah Al-Baqarah, Chapter 2

 I feel this sense of not living anymore....actually Subhannallah, scratch that. I FEEL INCOMPLETE. Like a bird without her wings. Frankly because I've delayed my time in finding a good Mu`alim (teacher). Ever since college started, I quit on Qura'an. I stopped memorizing or even reading it on my free time. Overwhelmed with exam after exam, homework, and friends, I let go of the one thing that put me to rest, that took me to a different world than the one I was living in. I left my Qura'an and never looked back to glance at it one more time. Never did it cross my mind that it would be difficult to get a hold of myself...to restore life's work and become one with my Qura'an all over again.  

When will this feeling overcome me? When will I be able to READ or RECITE like the blissful, fervent, and ecstatic 12 year old girl I was? WHEN WILL I BE ABLE TO READ AGAIN?